My Own little List

For if I ever get to be Lord High Executioner

Photo by Alireza Jalilian on Unsplash

With yet more apologies to Messrs Gilbert and Sullivan

As someday it may happen revolution comes around
I’ve got a little list — I’ve got a little list
Of objectionable folk who might as well be underground
And who never would be missed — who never would be missed!
There’s the pestilential nuisances on social media sites —
Cyclists who undertake you when you’re stuck at traffic lights —
The scrounging tramps who tell you that they’re “living off the grid” —
The people who raid biscuit tins and don’t replace the lid —
The twits who go out shopping, but who never make a list —
They’d none of ’em be missed — they’d none of ’em be missed!

[Chorus]
He’s got ’em on the list — he’s got ’em on the list;
And they’ll none of ’em be missed — they’ll none of ’em be missed

There’s the tone-deaf precinct busker, and the others of his race
And the would-be gangsta rapper — I’ve got him on the list!
And the people who eat curry and exhale it in your face
They never would be missed — they never…